I’ve realized many things in the past—and upon discovery,
threw them in a box, never considering to uncover their details. Tonight one
such realization occurred to me, ancient yet important. The one of my happiness—or
whatever closest to it I can attain—disappearing for no good reason when in the
mode of ‘crush’. I fall apart only because I am undoing the seams and lose my
voice because I thrown all my dongs into the sea. All of this is in my hands.
The hopelessness of it torturing me then, and partially now, can die through
the hands of its possessor. I am the girl who killed the dream and replaced it
with a nightmare. I sleep now to face this.