This Spring Break bears the anti-climaticism of New Year’s
Eve. Time with my family is misspent—if spent at all. Most friends seem to have
flittered away—withered, as opposed to the live flowers I came to enjoy. I find
myself explaining my current rite of passage to these now-strangers over cups
of coffee. Every time I come back it seems to get worse. I feel like I’ve
changed, or maybe it’s this city. Whatever it is, being here disorients me. I
want to be happy—pray, eat, smile, laugh, karaoke, dance…I just want to feel at
home in my hometown.