The past two weeks would tell the story
of a girl trying to get through the day—and in-between the times he’s calling
or texting, she squeezes in the mundane and petty activities she had formerly
known as ‘her life’. These include working out, drinking water, not boozing
during the week, tanning, school, playing with dog, avoiding annoying roommate,
cleaning/thinking about cleaning my room, teaching, working at the curriculum
development place, smelling good, and keeping up with friends. These are the
things I ‘fill my time up with’ in the between his texts and calls which occur
about every two days.
It’s gotten better than it was in the
past. I’m maintaining my sense of self. Making him not the whole pie but just a
few pieces. Now to reduce the size of his pie in my life, really not to realize
that that catalogue of activities is what gives my meaning, value, color and
purpose.