It’s strange reading past excerpts. The
days of confusion and dissatisfaction began to haunt me as my perusal went
on—so I stopped reading. I needed to stop. I fear abandoning the clarity and
satisfaction gained in the past six months. Truth is, whether I read my past
words or not, I am regressing.
I haven’t written, studied or painted for
a month. This was what the beginning of he and I was. We’ve been spending a lot
of time together lately. Again. I can’t call it a relationship…because we’ve
already failed at that. So I’ll call it a dynamic. ‘We have a great post-break
up dynamic’. But, when facing up to this brain-fuck I realize that no matter
how I put it, it equals regression.